The Home and Garden Top 100 Blog is pleased to announce that the drum pump has made the list of Top 100 Pieces of Equipment. This is good news for this particular piece of equipment because once a piece of equipment crosses the barrier into the Top 100 list it instantly experiences a boost in it notoriety and therefore it experiences a boost in its over all sales. The question naturally becomes just what were the factors that went into this particular shift for the drum pump. A thorough examination of this question shall occupy the subject matter of the remainder of this blog post.
THE TOTE PUMP HAS NOT YET MADE THE LIST
Interestingly enough, the cousin of the drum pump which is the tote pump has not yet made the famous Top 100 Pieces of Equipment list. There are obviously many factors that influenced this lack of shift. For example, this particular piece of equipment has not achieved the status that the other piece of equipment has in terms of popularity and usability. Obviously there are many factors at play in making this determination as well. A thorough examination of this dynamic is probably beyond the scope of this blog post, however.
When we get right down to it, there is no secret as to why a piece of equipment happens to make the list. When we go through the process of ordering all pieces of equipment we must evaluate how one piece of equipment compares to another piece of equipment. This requires us to enumerate the factors that give value to any one piece of equipment. We then do this for all pieces of equipment and then compare those values against one another. What results is a very long list of pieces of equipment from which we take the Top 100 to create our list.
There are clearly many uses for a drum pump that can be discussed on this blog. The following are among the Top One Hundred uses that have been reported to us based on the polling of our readership.
100. A pump of this sort can be used to extract tooth paste from an industrial drum in the back room of a dental office.
99. A pump of this sort can be used to extract a chemical from a drum in a laboratory where medicine is synthesized.
98. A tote pump as opposed to a drum pump can be used to extract the liquid contents of a tote for what ever purpose it was intended to be used.
97. A pump of this sort can be used to extract lotion from a drum of lotion in order to moisturize large populations of people.
96. A pump of this sort can be used to extract freshly squeezed orange juice from a drum in the mess hall used to serve large numbers of military personnel.
95. A pump of this sort can be used to extract any sort of liquid from any sort of drum for any sort of purpose.
94. A pump of this sort can be used to extract shampoo or other cosmetic type products from a drum in a laboratory used to test the toxicity of the product when it comes in contact with human skin or eyes. Please take note that this particular item in no way should be taken to imply that we at the Home and Garden Top 100 Blog endorse in any way the use of animals for the testing of the toxicity of chemicals regardless of the use that they are employed to serve. In fact the Home and Garden Top 100 Blog is well known to be a blog that is very interested in the welfare of animals.
Let us now turn our attention to the top one hundred jokes on the subject of the drum pump and see if it can produce a chuckle or two. For laughter is an important part of life. It makes this miserable experience of existence a little more palatable than it would otherwise be. We all know that we must see this sad existence all the way through to its proper end. Suicide is a foul form of cheating and is strictly forbidden. Therefore, if we must be here all this time we might as well laugh and make the most of it.
BRING ON THE TOP 100 DRUM PUMP JOKES!
100. Why did the pump cross the road? Answer : Although pumps are essentially inanimate objects and cannot cross roads under their own power, they can be transported from one location to another under the power of a person. Therefore, the reason for the pump crossing the road would be the reason for the person transporting the drum pump across the road. For this reason you should see the information you are looking for from that person I suspect.
99. Why does the pump wear red suspenders? Answer : to keep his or her pants up.
98. A one eyed Chinaman and a pump walk into a bar. The Chinaman orders a beer and the pump orders a glass of sparkling water. The bartender quickly serves the Chinaman but proceeds to ignore the request of the pump. At length the pump sits up in his chair and clears his throat. “Excuse me,” the pump spoke up. “What about my glass of sparkling water?” “Oh,” replied the bartender, “I thought you were joking about that.”
97. Knock knock. Who’s there? A pump fit for a drum. A pump fit for a drum who? Orange you glad I did not say banana again?